lifestyle coaching

Ranting and naming names is never a good thing. Forget what it does to the other guy, me it leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

So now I'm going to rant and not name names. Let's talk about Alex K. Is that anonymous enough for you? Kafkaesque enough? It's that letter K.

Pretty, shiny Alex is in his early 30s. He's a lawyer, a conflict mediator, a lifestyle coach, and a jet setter. He advises corporate executives and government departments. He is also, modestly left unmentioned on his website, an all round creep. With those credentials, how could he not be? Because of shared property issues (Montreal shared triplex ownership) we've had some consistent dealings with him in the past few years. He is, in no particular order:

- Lazy. Lets his wife do all the heavy lifting, phone calling, organising.
- Unresponsive. A typical email to him takes 4 to 6 weeks before we get a response.
- Obsequious. Master of the empty smile, the quick handshake, the domineering body language.
- Good looking. In that soft, doughy way that will fall apart in another 10 years.
- Suspicious and tight. Makes us justify and prove every little building expense and maintenance.
- Entitled. Treats us like his personal concierge team, instead of the neighbours that we are.
- Quick to anger. You have to see the emails.

This is an educated and successful guy. This is a guy who moves through the world like an ice-breaker moves through the Arctic. Coldly. The irony that he is a conflict mediator and a negotiation trainer is just too rich to believe. Who the hell is paying him the big bucks?

What is going on with my crappy mood these days? Don't even get me started with Yoga Bitch on the third floor. I suspect that she thinks an elevated consciousness is a corner office on the 23rd floor. If anyone's going to create a yoga corporate empire, she will. I suppose I don't even have to add that she's not very friendly.

I need a holiday. I need my baby back. What is it with all the uninspiring people?